Corner View "Mother"

Since as far back as my memory can go, I remember wanting to be a mother.  I was a little girl who played with baby dolls.  I even went so far as collecting soda pop cans from all the neighbors in my grandma's neighborhood so that I could buy baby doll clothes at the 5 and dime store down the street.  I think I had probably one of the best dressed baby dolls in the neighborhood. 

I didn't really feel like writing this post today because I am sure I wouldn't win the mother of the year award today.  My 13 year old told me I am ruining his life.  I don't know if I should take it to heart or think gee I must be doing something right.  I never thought being a mother would be so hard.  I thought all you had to do was just love and they (meaning my children)  would understand how much I love them and want to be obedient.  I have heard of stories where all the mother had to do was look at their children and they behave.  I wish I had that trick.  However, I love my children. I tell them every day that I love them and sometimes maybe even 5.  It isn't always so simple.  While I do some really grand things for my children, I hope at the end of the day it is the really small things that matter the most.  I hope they understand the sacrifices made for them.  I hope they know that I wanted and choose to be their mother.

To my mother and my mother-in-law, thank you for all that you have done for me, my husband, and our family.  I know sacrifices were made and that being a mother is not an easy job, and just because we are no longer living at home you haven't stopped being a mother.

To all the women in my life and in my children's life, even if you may not have children of your own, you have been mother's too because it really does take a village to raise a child. 


I love your post and I am right there with you on how hard it is sometimes. My 9 year old son is "Mr Angry' these days and grumpy and rude as soon as he sets foot out of bed! I heard it gets easier when they are about 18 - then it's a whole new set of issues!!! I too say 'I love you' many times a day, no matter how many 'discussions' we've had. The hardest and best job in the world.
liza said…
This is a beautiful post. I agree about how hard it is, and my boy is just seven. He and I laugh because he groans at how many times I tell him I love him every day! Happy Mothers Day to you, Kelleyn.
I'm also in awe of your ability to adapt to living abroad. You are doing great!
Arctic Mum said…
As a parent you can only do your best, and as long as they know they're loved...but thirteen is a difficult age, I remember how angre I was myself at thirteen. As for the mother award - I certainly didn't win it either the weekend I had the three small ones all by myself...glad anyone didn't tape it.
flowtops said…
It is OK to feel like your stumbling in the dark sometimes.

It is OK for your kids to be grumpy or opiniated sometimes.

It is OK to share your worries sometimes.

We're all the same.

Thank you!

Bonnie said…
You are right, it is the small things they will remember ... and the i love you's !!
Unknown said…
Ah, the teen years. :) Don't worry, you're not ruining his life. You're definitely doing something right!
Emily said…
I agree. Motherhood is harder than I ever expected. It's more rewarding, too, but the risks feel so high sometimes. I think we just have to keep doing our best though, in our human, fallible way, and one day they'll understand how deeply they are loved. I hope so anyway, and I trust.

Happy Mother's Day!
Heather said…
13 - such a rough age. I still remember some of the hateful things I said although I knew I was loved and I'm sure he does,too!

Teenagers - the reason people created boarding schools :-)
Theresa said…
Thanks for the honesty. I would take the life being ruined comment with a very small grain of salt and give him an extra long hug tonight.
A wise old woman once said to me "the best mothers are the ones that feel the guiltiest."
You are doing well, lots of change. It will get better.
Juana said…
Kelleyn, don't worry about! every thirteen years old tell her mother's ruin her life!:)
Have a nice weekend!
Nancy Quinn said…
Every 13 year old in the history of the world tells their parent they are ruining their life. You are a great mom. Need your address to send Winston's birthday gift.
Francesca said…
That's tough when it happens. I'm probably too analytical for my own good, but I would question why he said that. Of course he didn't mean that you ruin his life, but what he probably meant by that is that he's finding life difficult at the moment - why?
Happy Mother's Day Kelleyn! (you know, I don't even actually know when it is, shh!)
Redeker said…
this photo has made me smile!!!
what lovely and so open!!

and pubers are pubers, i think that if my daughter says i'm ruining her life, that she can say it because of the love what there is!
First of all, look at those adorable curls :) Secondly, Happy Mother's Day!
And finally, yes, you are right. This mothering business is hard work and it really does take a village. Before having kids, I never would have imagined that there would be so many extreme highs and lows. It is such an intense,humbling, and awe-inspiring experience, isn't it? Hang in there and enjoy the roller coaster ride.
nadine paduart said…
motherhood is no bed of roses.
you didn't do anything wrong, i'm sure. thirteen year olds are pains-in-da-you-know-where, and it doesn't get any better soon either. my experience.
in the end though, they do love us!
Audrey said…
Being a mother is never easy. Besides love, you also need patience. Lots of it.

At the end of the day, what matters is you have done your best. For that, your kids will know one day.
Shauna said…
Oh I've been relishing your posts! Been gone a trip for a few days and back now. My kids are now following too as soon as I showed them that awesome German park your kids were at a few posts back. They are on some apparatus that looks like it flings you around. My kids all said, " how come our parks don't have that?" Looks so fun.

I love this picture! She's precious and perfect. I also loved the book list. My kids have read almost all of those too. They are the good ones. We don't have television in our home and it's served us so well.

A few they haven't read, I'll be making a note. So glad you are doing well, and are so happy. Take care,

Joyce said…
a wonderful post and so true I don't know how mother do all that they do. In my book you would win the mother of the year award. I hope your son doesn't read your comments, because I don't want to egg him on, but his comment made me smile and some day it will make you both smile when he thanks you for being the great example of a mom. :) xo

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